Truth at Last!
The TDC Agenda
To be perfectly honest, we never realized we had an agenda. But after so many sensible, rational fans pointed out with such convincing evidence how obvious our agenda really is, we had to be honest with ourselves and say, “Hey! You know what, guys? We really do have an agenda — a gay agenda!”
Self awareness can be so cleansing. So, now that we have figured out who we truly are, we thought it was time to share with the world just exactly what the TDC Gay Agenda actually is. We hope this will clear up any remaining questions or misconceptions about us, and help put things into perspective.
The TDC Gay Agenda
Let it be known that
- Henceforth and for all time in all regions, all gay fans of David Archuleta shall be afforded priority seating at all concert venues, and preferred access to tickets and special events shall be supplied on a gay first-come gay first-serve basis.
- Henceforth and for all time in all regions, all stylists, costume designers and hairdressers will be required to evolve the David Archuleta stage persona into that which resembles a glam-rock, guyliner wearing, Adam Lambert clone (because, as so many have so often observed, we don’t really like David Archuleta the way he already is, anyway).
- Henceforth and for all time in all regions, all lyrics in all David Archuleta songs shall be gender-neutral, implying neither specifically heterosexual or homosexual relationships. When he sings in French, David shall use neither “le” or “la” to describe inanimate objects, so as not suggest a gender preference for things like flowers or food processors.
- Henceforth and for all time in all regions, all female reveries about David Archuleta shall be confined to fantasies involving David not as a boyfriend or a husband, but as the proverbial gay best friend. TDC will supply links to reruns of the television sitcom “Will & Grace” for any females who are unfamiliar with the territory. Furthermore, any late-night online chats held in private for the purposes of salacious fantasizing about David’s physical attributes will be required to include an equal number of young, single gay men as there are mature, married women.
- Finally, and most importantly, let it be known and understood throughout the land that we hereby acknowledge as accurate the oft-proposed observation that we desperately, passionately want David to be gay. We know that wanting him to be gay will have a significant influence on his being gay, and, really: Why shouldn’t we want David to be discriminated against? To never be able to get married? To lose the support of his family and his church? Yes, those are the things we wish for David, beyond everything else.
– davidfanLiz, jackryan4da, ronaldsf, Marlie7, and Ras–oh, ha ha, there we go again, failing to acknowledge what the arbiters of the fan community have already observed: that none of the TDC team members have any real independence or voice of their own. They’re all hypnotized by Rascal! Why bother listing their names at all? Relax and look deeply… deeply into my agenda…
ABOUT THIS AUTHOR
And the truth shall set us free!
Absolute perfection. I thought you were trying to get him his 15 minutes of gay fame, and get him a gig in a thong on a pride float.
Because, you know, that’s what we all strive for!
Okay, I’m spamming, but I just loved this post! So, I must add…”not that there’s anything wrong with that!”
Ok so I have been gay my entire life and keep hearing about this gay agenda. I have asked as many gay people and gay organization as i have people and orgs who claim that there is a gay agenda to please send me a copy of this gay agenda because it is impossible for me to work on its key points if i haven’t read it. with that said i just want to thank TDC for finally given one to me, at last i can now work to conquer heterosexuality and smite it from the face of the planet…MWUAHAHAHAHAHAH! *twirls curly evil mustache*
LOL -- you guys are funny. Thanks for getting this, too.
PS -- and don’t forget, you need us heterosexuals for breeding purposes
I feel sooooooooo relieved that I can finally “come out” about our homosexual agenda. It’s sooooooo much easier and less complicated to simply act on our agenda openly. So admins: does this mean we can stop pretending to be a David fansite?
@marlie7 just a reminder all you need is a gay guy a lesbian a turkey baster and some good adult movies and you get a baby….lol we still love you Marlie7
First TDC, and now turkey basters? KRIS! Don’t unveil our entire evil plan!
Kris bwahahahahah
RASCAL! Your new avatar! I just noticed it in the other thread LOLOL
I want to laugh along, but it actually makes me a bit sad and weary to read this. The road to tolerance is a long one…
You want to know who has an agenda? youtube has an evil agenda. I’ve been going through various fansites and looking up old posts and you would not believe how many old videos that once existed are now gone forever. Enough to make a grown person cry.
Fortunately, there seems to be an underground army, that revives some of those beloved videos. (Happy Birrrthday! Jon’s Mooom) But, its sad to know that some of David’s videos that used to have millions of views are now down to the hundreds.
Kinda reminds me of Fahrenheit 451, dedicated troops determined to keep the Archu-history alive.
Now I feel like seeing if David ever sang some John Philip Sousa.
There aint no good guys,
There aint no bay guys.
There’s only you and me
and we just disagree.
PEACE
Well of course that should read “bad guys”, haha.
goboywonder: You inspired me:
Thanks Marlie. I didn’t know who sang the song but the chorus keeps ringing in my head as this thing spirals on and on and has taken on a life of its own. Tit for Tat.
WE JUST DISAGREE (Dave Mason)
Been away, haven’t seen you in a while.
How’ve you been?
Have you changed your style and do you think
That we’ve grown up differently? Don’t seem the same
Seems you’ve lost your feel for me
So let’s leave it alone, ’cause we can’t see eye to eye.
There ain’t no good guys, there ain’t no bad guys.
There’s only you and me and we just disagree.
Ooo -- ooo -- ooohoo oh -- oh -- o-whoa
I’m going back to a place that’s far away. How bout you?
Have you got a place to stay? Why should I care?
When I’m just trying to get along We were friends
But now it’s the end of our love song…
So let’s leave it alone, ’cause we can’t see eye to eye.
There ain’t no good guys, there ain’t no bad guys.
There’s only you and me and we just disagree.
Ooo -- ooo -- ooohoo oh -- oh -- o-whoa
So let’s leave it alone, ’cause we can’t see eye to eye.
There ain’t no good guys, there ain’t no bad guys.
There’s only you and me and we just disagree.
Ooo -- ooo -- ooohoo oh -- oh -- o-whoa
We don’t all have to agree, but can we all at least be R.E.S.P.E.C.T.F.U.L. to each other, and David. I don’t see how this is beneficial to David. Remember him? The reason we are here? The reason for ALL of his fansites. JMHO.YMMV.etc.,etc…
Let cooler heads prevail.
Yeah, we are pretty much on to other things at this point. But it was cathartic to post this humorous (oh, heck it was hilarious) article and respond this way to the vitriol spewing from other sites rather than just keep spewing it back.
We’ll have something else to post here soon, but this was quite fun to work on, and having the whole admin team add ideas and review was really a treat.
“But it was cathartic to post this humorous (oh, heck it was hilarious) article and respond this way to the vitriol spewing from other sites rather than just keep spewing it back. ….
but this was quite fun to work on, and having the whole admin team add ideas and review”
And yet, Marlie7, the one person who is at the center of all this “fun” is not even thought about here and the fact that he would most likely not appreciate being the center of the pot being stirred in this “fun” article that Rascal has not re-linked in another article and on and on and on and so it goes (as David would sing). For me, it’s all about David and this is to ME not caring one bit about David, the person, the musician.
edit that to be “Rascal has now”
collegemom: For me, David does not live in isolation from the surrounding culture. In fact, the culture that he lives in can provide a significant influence for his work, for his artistry. There is a reason that we speak of artists of all genre becoming more seasoned, deeper, able to cut closer to the bone -- it is because they have experienced life in all of it’s many flavors. Traveled to different cultures and countries, felt loss and love and despair and joy. All of the experiences that help each of us to grow and more fully understand our own humanness.
This site acknowledges that David is not living in a bubble, nor should he. There are a variety of people who he will interact with, and I suspect he has not been writing songs with only “straight people.” I suspect that he might have publicists and producers and backup musicians and all manner of industry contacts who are gay or in other ways diverse from the people in David’s old neighborhood.
So yes, we had some fun with the article because, good lord, a gay agenda? That’s like saying that we are promoting a brunette agenda, or a blue-eyed agenda. David will/does interact with diverse individuals all the time. Let’s get over the shock and awe of it.
collegemom #19
I think it’s important to point out that we do not fix the focus on ourselves. Others do that, presumably because they don’t agree with the kind of focus we sometimes fix on David. We are only responding.